UK Humor: "Do you speak climate change? A BBC guide"

 Source:

https://www.conservativewoman.co.uk/do-you-speak-climate-change-a-bbc-guide/

"A COPY of the BBC’s guide The Climate Emergency: A Glossary for Presenters has been passed to The Conservative Woman.

Here are some of the entries:

Arctic/Antarctic: Places where ice melts and never refreezes.

‘Build Back Better’: A phrase to be broadcast as often as possible on behalf of our supporters in government, the WEF, the UN, the WHO, the CCP etc.

Catastrophic: Adjective to describe any slightly unusual weather event. Can be used in conjunction with Unprecedented. (See Unprecedented)

Climategate: A conspiracy theory inspired by ‘Big Oil’ to discredit hard working Climate Scientists. (See Climate Scientists; Conspiracy theorists)

Climate Scientists: Selfless experts with integrity and a monopoly of wisdom.

Conspiracy theorists: Those who disagree with the BBC’s opinions. Those who attribute ulterior motives to politicians and brilliant Climate Scientists.

Delusional: Those who disagree with ‘The Science’ (see The Science).

Denier: A term of abuse to equate those who disagree with us to those who deny the Holocaust.

Flat-earther: An easy-to-remember term for those who disagree with our editorial policies.

Global warming: An outdated term as the world is probably cooling. Instead use ‘climate emergency’ or ‘climate crisis’.

Greta: Greta Thunberg (aka St Greta; Great Greta; Climate Crusader etc). Teenage Swede; to be used with care as she is probably past her sell-by date.

Insects: A perfectly acceptable and tasty alternative to meat for non-vegans. (See Meat)

Lower/working class: Those with no understanding of the climate emergency; their opinions should be ignored.

Meat: A significant cause of global warming easily substituted by insects. (See Insects)

Meat-eaters: People who have no concern for the future of the world. (See Lower/working class)

Members of Parliament: Useful idiots. (See Middle class)

Middle class: Natural supporters of BBC opinions who can afford the sacrifices others will need to make. (See Lower/working class)

Polar bears: Emotive emblems of climate change. Substitute with penguin, puffin, panda or photogenic creature of your choice that you wish to claim is ‘endangered’.

Sea level rise: A potent threat as many cannot swim.

‘Since records began’: A phrase to be used when describing any kind of weather.

The Guardian: A useful and reliable source of climate scare stories.

The science/Follow the science: Stock response to silence deluded sceptics. Scientists are always right, as proved by Covid response.

Unprecedented: An adjective to precede any mildly unusual weather. (See Catastrophic).

Viewers: Uneducated rabble who need to be protected because of their ignorance of climate science."